Bird Flu Bird Brain

Every time I hear bird flu talk (and it's non-stop these days) the tune and words to a country and western song come into my mind and I get a chuckle at the ridiculousness of it all.

For the benefit of Orwell Today readers I'm linking to the song with the suggestion that you substitute the words "Pandemic Bird Flu" for "Tennessee Bird Walk" as you sing along:

Take away the trees
and the birds'll have to sit upon the ground.
(Hum)
Take away their wings
and the birds'll have to walk to get around.
and take away the birdbaths
and dirty birds will soon be everywhere.
and take away their feathers
and the birds will walk around in underwear.
Take away their (whistle)
and the birds'll have to whisper when they sing.
(Chirp chirp!)
and take away their common sense
and they'll be heading southward in the spring.

Oh, remember me, my darling when spring is in the air,
And the bald headed birds are whispering everywhere.
When you see them walking southward in their dirty underwear,
...PANDEMIC BIRD FLU.

How about some trees
so the birds won't have to sit upon the ground?
(Hum)
And how about some wings
so the birds won't have to walk to get around?
And how about a birdbath or two
so the birds will all be clean?
And how about some feathers
so their underwear no longer will be seen?
How about a little (whistle)
so the birds won't have to whisper when they sing?
(Chirp chirp!)
And how about some common sense,
So they won't be blocking traffic in the spring?

Oh, remember me, my darling when spring is in the air
And the bald headed birds are whispering everywhere
When you see them walking southward in their dirty underwear
...PANDEMIC BIRD FLU
(Chirp chirp!)
...PANDEMIC BIRD FLU
(Chirp chirp!)
...PANDEMIC BIRD FLU
(Chirp chirp!)
...PANDEMIC BIRD FLU
(Chirp chirp!)
...pandemic bird flu
...pandemic bird flu
...pandemic bird flu

~ original words & music by Jack Blanchard ~

Fears over bird flu could wipe out poultry exports, Daily Mail, Feb 6, 2007
Britain's poultry farmers are threatened by an international boycott that could wipe out exports of meat, eggs and live birds worth £400 million a year. At the same time the country's biggest supermarket, Tesco, reported there has been a dip in chicken and turkey sales apparently caused by the discovery of bird flu in Suffolk. The developments follow the outbreak of the virulent H5N1 strain at the Bernard Matthews turkey farm, where the culling of infected birds was completed yesterday. Exports of all meat, eggs and birds from the immediate 6.25-mile zone around the farm have been banned since the outbreak was confirmed at the weekend. Yesterday, Russia and Japan went further and banned all poultry and egg imports from farms throughout the UK while other nations are expected to follow suit. The authorities in both the north and south of Ireland have also blocked all live bird imports from Britain until the current emergency is over....